April 2013
4 posts
life, e.g.
“My dinner tonight is an apple and whatever alcohol I drink.” - Cameron
“Remember when Mel’s identity was stolen and they made his credit score better?” - Richie
“You know what’s really hard to have sex to? Family Guy.” - Cameron
“As someone who’s white and middle class, let’s face it, things will probably fall into place for...
1 tag
“Some of my favorite memories from when we lived together are when we would drink...”
– Cameron
February 2013
1 post
Cooperative Friends
group text: send me pictures of your faces. i have nothing planned for six hours and want to draw some shitty portraits.
…thanks guys.
November 2012
1 post
October 2012
1 post
This is my 1,000th Tumblr post and I'm wasting it.
July 2012
2 posts
Cameron Appreciation Hour part 2
“I FUCKING HATE BANANAS. I AM SO SICK OF TRYING TO LIVE MY LIFE AROUND THEM”
“I’m not judging you, I’m just describing you.”
“When it comes to food I prefer quantity over quality.” CAMERON: I’m going to make myself throw up. ME: Please close the door. CAMERON: No! I want you to hear my pain! “If you don’t have a lesbian...
bite-sized wisdoms
“Smart corgis are actually smarter than most dumb people.” - Benjamin “That’s what love is. You hire someone to be your nanny and then you shit yourself.” - Benjamin
“Straight men are more dangerous than gay men because they’re bad people.” - Richie
“Because we both love Firefly we could totally make out or...
June 2012
1 post
2 tags
chuy and olive boston terrier dog friends please...
May 2012
1 post
“I would pay attention to you but I have a burrito to eat.”
– Cameron
April 2012
2 posts
QUOTE DUMP
KYLE A: “I’m not racist, I’m just… afraid.”
CAMERON: “The guy I’m not dating is cheating on me!”
LANIE (ON THE NEW TWILIGHT): “This movie was not the fun time I wanted it to be. It felt like going to a strip club and watching a murder.” ALICIA: “I only know how to make Sex Eyes at food.” LANIE: “I wish we were talking...
March 2012
4 posts
Benjamin Appreciation Post
BEN: Everyone wants to cry and eat melons in front of you. Literally everyone wants to do this. ME: You’ve taken a poll? BEN: No, it’s just an innate thing. Like the desire to seek shelter or enjoy music. I understand human nature.
(my excuse for staying in that night wasn’t satisfactory) BEN: And with his last breath the cowboy whispered in the ear of his lover, “I need...
“You are the wind beneath my puns.”
– Andy. I don’t want to be this.
“You know a song’s going to be good when it starts with, “aw yeah.”
– Jenn. The Bell Biv DeVoe Pandora station is getting a lot of play these days.
1 tag
February 2012
2 posts
“God bless Mackenzie Goodman, Joe Rosenthal, and ABBA. The holy trinity.”
– Russ
“Last night I fell asleep on my iPad while reading a Wikipedia article on food in...”
– Jenn
January 2012
1 post
December 2011
2 posts
September 2011
4 posts
“I smell like a girl. I like it. It makes me feel less lonely.”
– Benjamin, spritzed with perfume.
“This couch is too comfortable. These mimosas are too drunk. The floor is too...”
– Benjamin. Went to a brunch that lasted 8 hours yesterday. Mimosas for everyone! Mimosas all day long.
1 tag
August 2011
5 posts
1 tag
HE HAS A POINT
CAM: Get him drunk so he'll sleep in my bed.
ME: I thought you didn't like him?
CAM: He'll do.
ME: I'm pretty sure he's straight.
CAM: So is spaghetti until it gets hot.
“She has this Korean flag and whenever I drape it about my shoulders I feel like...”
– Kyle discussing Starcraft 2.
“I would like something that looks like this but with me dressed as a physically...”
– Artistic direction from Benjamin.
“I have a bit of a slutty relationship with tea.”
– Ivan, who absolutely has a slutty relationship with tea.
“We’re all drunk, that’s the important question.”
– I wish I knew who shouted this so I could give them credit.
July 2011
4 posts
2 tags
“You’re the motherfucking LL Cool J of this wedding.”
– The best thing anyone has ever said to me while I was working.
“I have a mustache to rub on your face. Don’t you ever forget that.”
– Andy to Russ, in a surprisingly threatening tone.
June 2011
3 posts
“I’m going to teach you everything I know about boogie boards.”
– Hanging out with Britt’s niece, Hannah.
“I just wanna let you know that in a few months when I’m Baby Gap-skinny I...”
– Cameron. Shit’s getting all healthy up in here. Calorie counting and morning jogging all over the place.
May 2011
4 posts
March 2011
9 posts
“I’m pretty sure I had a heart attack last night so I just laid in bed all...”
– I have a 98-year-old friend who is the best.
“If you touch someone enough they become your friend.”
– Drunk Brittney Logic. 